More than ten
years ago, I heard about a memoir published with a similar subject, domestic
violence, and I wanted to find out how the author and her sisters dealt with it
for so long and why their mother didn’t know about it. But I didn’t read it. I
think the story took place in Texas.
Then I read part of this story, DRIVING WITH DEAD PEOPLE nine years ago or
so in the memoir-writing workshop I was in with the author, so I knew it was
published seven years ago. I wanted to read it but didn’t.
Why
do I avoid difficult subjects? Come to think of it, I have a history of
avoidance. For example, just before I left Japan in 1970 for the first time, I
read a book about Japanese feminists’ struggles and was shocked to find that
many Meiji women in kimono fought for women’s rights, and some went to jail.
Many female authors died young in the Meiji era (1868-1916). I felt guilty
because I knew I was a coward. Those women didn’t escape as I did, but they tackled
the fundamental problem of our world. They’ve been on my mind.
Racism
is another subject I didn’t know if I could ever challenge head on. At the
bottom of my heart, I wanted to be the kind of person who does not walk away
from problems that are in front of or around me.
So
I read DRIVING WITH DEAD PEOPLE slowly.
I enjoyed reading chapter by chapter for the culture was totally different from
mine, growing up. For instance, no guns lay around our house or on the floor of
any cars I rode on. I probably wouldn’t be able to truly understand the culture
and all the issues.
But I trusted the narrator for her adventurous
mind, braveness, and sense of humor. She was the story.
I
also read the reviews on Amazon about this book, and I thought some bad reviews
meant most of us, including old me, were not ready to read the book. But, I
believe, those readers benefited from the reading. If we encountered a strange
situation in our lives or heard about one, we could possibly see another
dimension to human nature because of the reading, so it might help us act on
it.
Suicide
is like racism, which adults teach children their prejudice. I was drawn to Wendy’s
death. She appeared only briefly in the story but left a strong impression on
me. After her death, the narrator tried to eulogize and honor her by setting up
something memorable in a display case along the school hallway. Her teacher
happens to pass by the hallway. He tells her to remove the display she was
working on.
The
teacher seems very cold. What will the narrator do or say next? Japanese
teachers would say something comforting to her no matter what was the situation
of her friend’s death. The narrator is a brave person but she doesn’t protest a
word and obediently follows the teacher’s instruction. She wonders what the
teacher meant by “epidemic.” We surely need to avoid the epidemic of suicide.
But
Suicide is a death of a human. I think we can still honor our friends, without
honoring suicide.
This
story contains complex issues: domestic violence, female struggles, racism, and
suicide. I believe they are all connected. I won’t write about the connection here
to make this review short.
As
all the good books, this book doesn’t lecture. The issues are global. The author
of DRIVING WITH DEAD PEOPLE shows how
it was from her viewpoint at the time she wrote. I honor her work because hers
is not an easy task.
